To the Boy I Loved for a Year

Dear boy I loved for a year,

It was inevitable.

Summer is coming to an end, we’re both going to two different colleges, and the distance was too much for us to handle. I would’ve loved for us to at least keep in touch, to finally talk to each other about how we were really feeling, but I guess it just wasn’t an option for us.

“College doesn’t change everyone,” I wanted to say, but even I didn’t know if that was true. We were kids, still are kids in my opinion, who were in way over their heads. I didn’t think I could love someone as much as I did you, especially in a year, but I guess a lot can change within a year.

Was it real love? I’m not sure, but it was definitely more than puppy love. With you I experience so many skipped heartbeats, endless hours of embarrassment, and a kind of happiness that I cannot describe.

Although there is a bitterness in my heart at the things that we left unsaid, I understand why things happened the way they did. It’s time I take my own advice and make peace with myself.

So, to the boy I loved for a year, I want to say goodbye.

 

I spent 12 months loving you, 1 month hating you, and the last month of my freedom forgiving you. I hope you’ve forgiven me as well and that in another month, both of us will stop with the “what if’s” and live.

I am making peace with myself and with you. You were my first love and will forever be my most cherished love. You showed me a love that I could’ve never imagine and made my heart skip a beat each and every time I saw you. You always showed me so much tenderness, as if you were afraid I would break. You gave me distance when I needed it but always pulled me back when I had gone too far. You gave me the perfect fairy tale, even it ends with us parting ways and for that I thank you. I hope you continue to treat every girl you love with the same tenderness you showed me. I hope you find your happily ever after and I sincerely hope we cross paths again.

 

Sincerely,

The girl you loved for a year

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